“No Feeling is Final”
Written by Jen Gao
For the introspective soul, so that every feeling is a stepping stone to wisdom.
It was the last day of the Narrative Healing workshop at Omega Institute of Holistic Studies.
While I had originally agreed the day before to attend a morning yoga class with my good friend and sorority sister Sweenly, I woke up slightly drowsy from a lack of, but at least better, sleep. The open meditation session at the Sanctuary had a stronger calling for me.
After dropping off Sweenly for yoga, climbing to the top of the Sanctuary, and taking off my shoes, I stepped inside the meditation room and sat in the back since I was a tad late, per usual, while the teacher and attendees were doing the first standing part. When everyone moved to the ground to do a 15-minute sitting meditation, I joined in and sat on one of the comfy meditation floor chairs. When the teacher acknowledged the timing, I thought to myself, “Yes, I’m getting my meditation in for today,” since I made an agreement with my brother/accountability partner that for every day I don’t meditate for at least 5 minutes, I’d owe him $5.
We meditated in silence, did a walking meditation outside, and then came back in to sit for a guided metta meditation. The whole session lasted about an hour. Normally, I prefer meditating in silence, but the last metta meditation, also called a loving-kindness meditation, was different from what I was used to; hence, there were new insights gained.
In my few experiences of practicing and guiding this, the loving-kindness meditation is traditionally similar and routine in its wording, where we express some variation of love, peace, ease, and kindness toward ourselves, someone else, a whole group of people, creatures, etc. But this teacher broke it up, switched it up, and added some of her own words, including:
No feeling is final.
After seeing and approaching this teacher at the dining hall during lunch, I later learned that this meditation teacher and former nun is named Dr. Ji Hyang Padma, and those words were originally shared by Rainer Maria Rilke. This message had always been sitting in my mind; it just took someone to say it out loud to remind me of its and meditation’s importance.
Meditation can be viewed in vastly different ways and used for many different purposes, but I personally use it—and value it so much as to have an accountability partner—because of its powers: the powers it passes on to me when I feel turbulent or powerless.
It has been said that meditation is a mental exercise, training the wheels to be prepared for any road bump, which is why I try to make it part of my everyday morning routine, right after brushing my teeth and before doing anything else for myself or others. But I’ve also used meditation at other times of the day when I feel my temper rising and irritation increasing. I’ve had a history of explosive disagreements with loved ones, but nowadays, I try to remove myself from the situation and resort to a short meditation—a shift to focusing on and slowing down my shallow breathing.
It has been a wonderful tactic, honestly. I come back calmer—maybe not yet ready to respond—but that is okay and probably better, as I give myself extra hours or day(s) to process and respond with grace. Meditation allows me to let go of the thoughts and feelings that don’t positively serve me and encourages me to focus on the things that ground and empower me.
In a world of constant change and a life of uncertainty, we can always be sure that the sun will rise again and that anything, any being, and any feeling will pass.
If you’d like to try the guided loving kindness meditation by Dr. Padma, check it out on her page here.
